Magic Kingdom - Fantasyland (WDW)

Cinderella's Golden Carousel

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages.

ADULT RATING – (C+) If you like going around in a circle.

Let's face it, a merry go round is a merry go round.  This one is prettier than most but it is still the same thing.  A bit of trivia for you: the white horse on the outside with the gold ribbon is Cinderella's horse.  The absolute BEST way I have found to ride this ride is with a fabulous guy wearing a pointy Princess hat.

Dumbo's Flying Elephants

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – High

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages.  This is a time tested favorite!

ADULT RATING – (C+) Again if going around in a circle is your idea of a great time, you will love this.  Personally I have found most adults just find it a few minutes of respite because now their kid is having a good time.

This is one of the Holy Grail rides of tiny tyke land.  All the little kids want to ride Dumbo and it is a pain in the.. donkey.  Why?  Because there are only a handful of elephants that fly for a specific amount of time.  This makes the ride very slow loading. If you want to ride without standing in the sun for over an hour, this is what you have to do.

Get your family up, dressed and going EARLY in the morning.  No excuses.  Poke them with something sharp if you have to.  Get them to the Magic Kingdom at least an hour before it opens.  They will open the front area of the Park and then have the "rope drop".  When the rope drops, go STRAIGHT TO DUMBO!!!  Do not get something to eat, don't stop to pee, GET TO THAT FLYING ELEPHANT!  This way you can ride right away, get off, get back in line and ride it a 2nd time.  See?  Wasn't that fun?  Now we can ride some of these other rides in Fantasyland.  The things you do for your kids....

It's A Small World

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages. 

ADULT RATING – (C+) OK, the ride is entertaining but that song will haunt your nighmares.

This is a poor imitation of the original ride at Disneyland.  Disneyland's is better.  The whole line is a topiary extravaganza!  The pop-out dolls and animated clock are iconic.  Magic Kingdom gets a tent.  whee.  This really is a fun ride.  Walt debuted this at the 1964 Worlds Faire in New York.  It is sweet, infectious and the song will imbed itself in your brain and never leave.

I must say the BEST time I ever had on this ride was at Disneyland in the 80's.  We had an AIDS fundraiser and riding this with a boatload of drag queens, singing along was the most magical thing EVER!

Mad Hatter's Teacups

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – Medium

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages but evaluate how they deal with spinning

ADULT RATING – (B) A fun ride if you like spinning like a looney

It's really not fair for me to review this ride because I hurl.  I hate spinning in circles and I hate spinning fast.  I avoid this ride like the plague.  So I will turn this over to my Disney Companion "Dot " for her analysis of this ride:

I really like spinning fast. Watch the teacups and head for the fastest spinners. Some are better than others. Spreading your weight out so you are not all clumped in one place also helps for maximum spinage.

I give this ride a solid B but the waiting and break-down factor can slip it to a B-.

Peter Pan

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – Medium

WAIT TIME – Medium

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages unless your kid is freaked out by the dark or flying over Lodon.

ADULT RATING – (B) Just for the sheer kitch and nostalgia.  I mean honestly, who doesn't like flying in the air in a pirate ship?

Peter Pan was always one of my favorites from Disneyland. They show more of the story on this ride than the original Disneyland version so I do like this one better. You can’t beat seeing everything from in the air in a sailing pirate ship. This was one of my favorite rides when I first went to Disneyland at 8 and still is.

While the ride cars (pirate ships) do not hold many people, the ride is short and they are quick to load.  At peak times there can be a wait of upwards of 45 minutes.  I personally think this is the best ride in Fantasyland.  How can you miss with flying out of Wendy's window, sailing over the streets of London, soaring over Neverland (please, not NeverNeverland) and watching a swordfight at the end between Pan and Hook?  It's the best.

One of the mermaids in the lagoon sequence looks a bit like Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Hmm. One small, picky geek note of an error on this ride. Peter Pan is set in late Victorian/early Edwardian London. When you are flying over London, look down. You will see streets filled with cars (headlights). There were no cars in Peter Pan’s London.  Barrie wrote Peter Pan in 1902.  The Model T Ford rolled off the line in 1908.  Even with this issue, I give this ride an A-

Kid Grade (G): Suitable for all ages.  Kids will either love the flying or be a bit scared.  It is perfectly safe but the "buoyancy" of being suspended from the top of the car may set very small children on edge.  Only minor scary scenes.  Nothing objectionable.

Pinocchio's Daring Journey

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages. 

ADULT RATING – (C)

Pinocchio is not my favorite story.  Let's see, a creepy old guy builds a little boy puppet to keep him company, a blue fairy brings the puppet to life and the puppet goes wild.  He is inconsiderate, goes truant from school, smokes, drinks, barely escapes turning into a donkey only to go on a voyage of redemption to try to find the father figure he lost.

We see the dancing puppets, Pleasure Island, the blue fairy, Monstro the Whale, all the good bits with little of the scary, dark and depressing parts of the movie/book.

Snow White's Scary Adventures

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages unless your child is freaked out by the dark, menacing trees or other "spooky" things.

ADULT RATING – (C) This is really pretty dull. Sorry.

When this ride was first designed for Disneyland it was always intended to be from Snow White's point of view.  As a result, she wasn't in the ride.  As the ride says, you see her "scary adventures" so there are lots of Evil Queens, warty hags, apples, scary trees, and falling rocks.  If your kid wants to see Snow, this is not the ride for them.  If they are freaked by the dark and scary things, like the Evil Queen trying to poison them (remember YOU are Snow White) then skip it.

True, the refurb threw in more dwarves and one shot of Snow but it doesn't change the fact that the ride is not all goodness and light and singing critters.  Make sure your kid understands.  For solo adults, pass it.  It's boring.

Winnie the Pooh

ADULT THRILL LEVEL – None

WAIT TIME – Low

KID GRADE – (G) Suitable for all ages. Only minor scary scenes.  Nothing objectionable.

ADULT RATING –  (B) if you are into Pooh

Here in WDW, Pooh created quite a stir.  He evicted staple Fantasyland ride Mr. Toad.  If you still want to ride Mr. Toad, you can do it at Disneyland.  At Disneyland, the rotund bear evicted his kin (The Country Bear Jamboree).  It seems Pooh brings ride destruction in his honey lickin' wake.  

All and all this was a nice ride (although I still miss Mr. Toad). The ride depicts Winnie the Pooh and the Blustery Day.  The cut-outs were bright and the animatronics were decent for a Fantasyland ride.  There was a variation of movement to the ride. You would bounce when Tigger was there, you felt like you were floating on water when it was raining, etc. There are a few tiny scary elements in the storm but it is not anything Mom can’t fix by being there. Teens may find it slow but I think it's just plain fun. I give this a B+.

The Most Horrific Ride Ever to Appear in the Magic Kingdom (and I loved it)

ALIEN ENCOUNTER: 

MAGIC KINGDOM/TOMORROWLAND

This was my favorite attraction at Magic Kingdom. Around 2002, it traumatized so many children that they re-vamped it into the idiotic "Stitch Encounter".  This is the story of one of the coolest rides that Disney ever thought of, it was just in the wrong park.  In my opinion, it should have been in "teen/tween park" Disney Studios.


I first rode this in 1998 and for the last time in 2001.  The mistake people made was to think a scary ride called Alien Encounter really wasn't that scary.  They thought it was Haunted Mansion scary.  They were soooo wrong. They thought Michael Eisner would NEVER put a truly terrifying ride in the Magic Kingdom of all places!  Evidently they didn't get the memo telling them that Eiser is the Devil. So let's go back in time to a day when the Happiest Place on Earth turned evil.


There are warning signs posted for this ride.  In my opinion, they are not large enough. This is a VERY mentally scary and intense ride. Grown-ups will have fun and find themselves a bit scared or freaked but if you take your child on this ride, you WILL be paying for therapy for the next 10 years. I am NOT kidding! Little kids have NO business on this ride.  Now I did my good deed by warning parents with small children that I saw on the buses about this ride.  I told them that perhaps one of them might want to screen it first.  It seems that I didn't talk to some of the people in line.  I like this ride for adults if you can deal with mind game scares.  It is less scary the second time around.


It is based (very loosely) on the Alien of Ridley Scott fame. You enter a very entertaining queue where you get a lesson in teleportation from an evil robot and his unwilling volunteer “Skippy”. Just seeing cute little Skippy get crispy in a teleporter “accident” and then have the slightly malevolent robot trap him in the transporter interface while in transit, perhaps permanently, can be a bit disturbing to kids.


You next enter a circular room where you sit around a giant tube. There is a large shoulder harness that comes down over you. While it is used for an effect later on, its main purpose is to keep people in their seats so they are not running around in terror in the dark and break their necks.  They start the show and someone starts talking on a screen about this new teleporter technology and how they are going to teleport something harmless to you in the theatre.  Yeah.. right.  Like that turned out real well for Skippy.


The teleporter is accidentally rerouted and instead of the chairman of the teleportation company coming to talk to you, an Alien is transported in his place.  The Alien busts out of the tube, total darkness descends and the fun begins. This is a total mind trip. Nothing in the room moves. You hear the Alien running on the catwalk, breathing hot breath on your neck, it kills a few people, you hear chewing sounds, you feel warm “blood” dripping on you from the guy he ate on the catwalk, etc. As you can tell, this is intense.


There was a kid sitting next to me that looked like Ralphie from “A Christmas Story”. He was about 9 years old and was screaming and hysterical with terror. His Dad was trying to calm him down, tell him it’s just a ride, that it’s not real but the kid was terrorized. I'm going to Hell because while I feel sorry for the kid, his genuine screams of abject terror really added to the experience of the ride. 


Please parents, don’t be selfish and drag your small children on this ride just because you want to see it. Do the child swap, preview the ride first, judge your childs ability to handle this before you damage them. I give this ride an A- for adults, and A for teens, a D for average kids and an F for small children. I think this would have been better at MGM/Disney Studios and put Star Tours here (like they have in Disneyland).

Snacks & Drinks Around The World

Here are a few snacks that we had that I felt were worth commenting on:

ANIMAL KINGDOM 
Bar Next To Tuskers

Pina Colada – This is a good place to get a drink, grab a table and watch the acrobats.  The only issue is that most of their frozen drinks are from machines or not very fresh.  I am spoiled since I have a tiki bar by me that makes their drinks with only premium boze, fresh squeezed juice and no mixes.  It was OK but next time I will have a beer.  That way you always know what you are getting.


The Royal Anandapur Tea Company - This is a GEM of a place if you like real tea vs. Lipton.  They have wonderful loose blends that they make into tea bags right there. They also have coffee drinks as well. If you like tea PLEASE check this out! It is on the way to Everest on the right hand side. It also has lovely seating areas. I would hate this to go away because people don't come.

When we were there, most people seemed to be ignorant about the different types of tea. I have had the following on various visits:
Silver Needle - One of China's best white teas. Brews at a pale yellow/reddish liquor and has a delicately sweet flavor.
Keteada - grown at a high elevation in Central Africa, this wonderful bold black tea is sure to please the palate.
China Green Jasmine - Classic scented green tea from Fouzou Province with jasmine flowers.
UPDATE 2010: Roobios Vanilla - This yummy tea with a smooth vanilla taste is perfect for a cold day.  I had wanted to taste their Dragon and Chai teas but they were out.  This one was recommended by the cast member and is lovely.

When we were there, most people just asked the CMs for "tea" or "hot tea" and were given most probably their mild house blend. When we asked for "Silver Needle" or "China Jasmine", first they just stared and then broke out into smiles figuring out that we were asking for SPECIFIC teas and were overjoyed.

I can't sing the praises of this enough. Also if you are one of these people from Starbucks - "I want a low fat, soy, double shot, dolce vente latte with hazelnut" - go home. I know - harsh - but true. I had this lady in front of me that was like this: "I want a grande capp with chocolate syrup". The guy stared at her like she was from Mars and said "You want a Mocha?" which is what she asked for and she says "do you have chocolate syrup that I can put in AFTER" and he tells her "no" and I just want to hit her in the head with a lemur and feed her to the Yeti because I get that way when confronted with pretentious coffee bar freaks. Don't be one of these people. Have the wonderful teas. Enough said. GO HERE!


Yak & Yeti (Yak Attack) - UPDATE 2010
This is soooo yummmy.  It is a mango daiquiri with extra rum and a berry swirl.  Go into the bar and get one.  You can get them at the "adult beverage counter" around the corner from the counter service food outside the restaurant but these are better.  I know, I tried both.

MAGIC KINGDOM:

Dole Whips:  I love these but only with the pineapple / vanilla swirl.  Disneyland has Dole Whips as well BUT they only have the straight pineapple, no pineapple/vanilla swirl and that is the only one worth having.  I think the pineapple straight is a bit too tart and the vanilla mellows this out.  This is one of the few snacks I inhale so fast I get brain freeze.  The other good thing is you can now use a SNACK CREDIT for one if you are on Disney Dining!

Mickey Bar:  I’m not fan.  I think they are OK but not my favorite.  To me there is nothing to separate it from any Eskimo Pie aside from its shape like Mickeys head.

Mickey Ice Cream Sandwich: Now we’re talking.  I really like these but I am a pushover for any kind of ice cream sandwich even when the cookies is all soft and bendy like 99% of them are.  The problem is they are limited to only a few places.  I know Disney Studios has them and Magic Kingdom but this is about it that I have found.

Popcorn:  Is Evil.  It tempts you with its smell, it makes you think how happy you would be if you had some so you break down and buy it.  Then you discover that Mickey and his Uber Larger salt shaker was already there.  No real butter, just artificial butter flavored solids (which I am sure has 50,000 chemicals in it).  The popcorn is a bit chewy, VERY salty and just not worth it once you were drawn to it’s siren song and found yourself wrecked upon the rocks.

THE BAR @ THE POLY:

Pineapple Mohito – Nice.  It was not as refreshing as a regular Mohito and wasn’t too sweet.  A nice afternoon by the pool drink - $7.00

Pina CoLava – Amazing!  It is a Pina Colada with Raspberry Puree that makes the “lava”.  It is soooooooooo yummy and refreshing - $7.75
Lapu Lapu - UPDATE 2010 - If you want a hard hitting drink that comes in a pineapple, this is your drink.  After a day at the "dry" Magic Kingdom, getting your ankles sythed off by strollers, you need a drink, you deserve a drink.  This pineapple is for you!

EPCOT/FUTURE WORLD - Fountain View Cafe

I got a fruit croissant!

Look and weep with joy at its beauty! A flaky, buttery croissant, filled with creamy custard, topped with glazed fruit of strawberries, kiwis and blueberries and the whole thing dusted with powdered sugar. And if that isn't good enough, there are blueberries INSIDE THE CUSTARD! Let me just die now! $3.51 By the way - they lie. There is a sign saying that most pastries were not served after 10:30am. What it really means is they will serve until they are all sold. The fruit one is available all day though. GRADE: A-
UPDATE 2010:  This eatery has now changed to all ice cream and I have not been able to find this beauty anywhere.  I still cry a little at night.

EPCOT/WORLD SHOWCASE

EPCOT – MEXICO

Layered Margarita – too sweet for me.  This combo, lime/strawberry/mango/kiwi drink is from a machine rather than made from fresh fruit.  Tons of chemicals and not enough booze.  Looks pretty but you can get better drinks elsewhere.
UPDATE 2010: Margaritas & Tequilla in "The Ditch" - Mexico has opened a new tequilla bar.  A person on the DIS board coined the moniker "The Ditch" and I like it so I am using it.  I told all the cast members I could find about it.  It seems you walk into the ditch, find yourself trapped and then can't crawl out.  They have TONS of tequillas.  There are a variety of prices and even flights to try.  I would recommend just sipping and not using "Training Wheels" (salt & lime).  Margaritas are also available singly or in flights with such yummy flavors such as Prickly Pear, Blood Orange, Avocado & Cucumber.  These do NOT come out of a slushie machine and are well worth the money.  The cast members told me this bar evolved out of the 2009 Food & Wine Festival.  They were the most popular drink book 4 timers over so Disney smartly took advantage of that popularity.

EPCOT - CHINA
Lotus Blossom Cafe - yes, yes, I know - Friends do not let friends eat at the Lotus Blossom Cafe. I didn't. I drank. I had an iced plum tea. It was really nice. Fruity, refreshing, slightly sweet but not overpowering. $2.67 with tax.

EPCOT – NORWAY

Kringla Bakery - I LOVE this place. Let see, here is the hit parade thus far:
Lefse Bread $1.99. Think a very thin flour tortilla spread with butter, sprinkled with cinnamon and then rolled tightly. Nice pocket food for easy transportation. Not too sweet but a nice treat. Great for kids, not too messy, not full of processed crap.  
Rice Cream - $2.29 - I LOVE THIS STUFF! cold white rice that is mixed with sweetened cream then topped with strawberries in strawberry sauce. I mix it all up so all the sweet creamy rice gets some of the strawberry and it is just heaven! The best sweet yummy in Epcot! Is it THAT good? You bet your sweet donkey it is!.

School Bread – I really want to like this.  I think that it is just a different texture than Americans are use to.  When you look at it you think of a Krispy Kreme donut covered in coconut.  The custard is really good, the coconut is good but the cake is not soft like a raised donut or even like a cake donut.  The cake is more dense and dry.  It is not sweet like an American donut.  As long as the custard holds out, fine but the bread by itself needed something.  Like I said, I think our American tastes are so skewered with too much sugar that this doesn’t work for us as much.  Europeans would probably like it better.

Cloudberry Horn – Very nice.  Not overly sweet but still nice.  A crispy pastry horn with large sugar crystals on the outside with cream piped inside.  Yummy.

EPCOT - ITALY

Rosa Regale – at La Bottega Italiana - this is the bright red sparkling wine that everyone is ga ga about. It is a deep, pure red with a nose and slight taste of roses. It is really lovely.  You can get this at BevMo (Beverages and More), some people have found it at Cost Plus and Costco.This sparkling wine is amazing.  $6

Cannolli – I am really picky with my cannolli.  I don’t put any neon fruit inside mine.  This cannolli taste wise was really rich and good.  The ricotta cheese was fresh and very creamy.  The only problem is the size vs. the price.  I think they should either be larger for the same price or same size but less money.  They are only about 3 inches long which is just not big enough.  Yes, it is about size. - $6
UPDATE 2010:  Someone was reading my mind and the cut the price to around $3.  I was unable to see the size since it was raining and the cart was closed but I will venture to say it is the same size only a reduced price.

EPCOT - GERMANY
Eiswein - this is a tiny taste (2 oz.) of German Ice Wine. It is very sweet but with a very clear edge. They give you a little 70% cocoa fine chocolate to eat with it. They should since this wine shot costs you $12.01 with tax. Remember that is TWO OUNCES. Regular wine glasses are 6-8 oz. I splurged. Was it worth $12 for that taste. Not really but it didn't suck either. Now I am waiting to break open my Canadian icewine.

EPCOT – MOROCCO

Baklava – this phyllo dough pastry with nuts and honey is always yummy.  At the back of the tangerine café you can get a choice between many different kinds.  Some less sticky, some with chocolate, some with crushed pistachio nuts (like the one below) but all good.

EPCOT – JAPAN

Kaki Gori – OK, they are snowcones and who doesn’t like a snowcone?  However their rainbow / 3 flavor one is the best.  Three strips of Tangerine, Honeydew Melon and Strawberry.  Total Yum!  The Melon especially was very refreshing on a hot day.  You can get the flavors seperatly  as well.


Sake, mmmmmm hot sake. Now this is a good buzz. Just don't pair it with Kaki Gori as the flavors don't mix. Kaki Gori is a Japanese snow cone.  YUMMY. So very refreshing. Just no sake with it. Have the sake later. It can be confusing because they are sold out of the same cart and if you get the sake first and start pounding sake’s you can be in a lot of trouble. I mean Cast Members pulling your donkey out of the lake trouble as you try to swim home.

EPCOT – FRANCE

I know people are all about the bakery here but I think the bakery in Norway WAAAYYY surpasses this one.  I find these offerings way too sweet for my taste.  I had the chocolate mousse here once and it was a bit dry and kinda nasty.
UPDATE 2010:  I did find the level of their pastries has gone up.  Their croissants (plain, chocolate and almond are all VERY good.  I also tried a long pastry filled with almond paste which was lovely.  As where their cream puffs.  I was still scared by my previous bad mousse experience and since I'm not that much into chocolate, I didn't miss it.  OK, I was so carried away by this chocolate croissant that I forgot to get a picture until it was half gone.

The wine shop did offer some nice cocktails like the Kir Royal and the Pomegranite Kir along with other champagne drinks.  I’ll take these over dry mousse any day.  However some red wine I cannot pronounce, (once again) tasted like ummmm, donkey. Why do I keep saying donkey? Because I can't say ass in a Disney blog. How do I know it tasted like donkey? Because if I was to guess what a donkey would taste like, I would point to this wine. AND it set me back $6.23 a glass. The whole French pavilion needs a trip to Napa to see what they are missing.


EPCOT - ENGLAND
Rose and Crown Pub - Guinness. That wonderful chewy breakfast beer, loaded with lots of good for you grains with a hint of malty chocolate flavor set me back $7.46 without tip. Our barkeep also poured a shamrock into the foam on top for good luck. ALSO, you can take your booze TO GO! Just like the French Quarter! ROCK ON! Just no flashing!

The Tea Caddy - Part of my quest for "weird candy" aka "candy we don't have here in 'Merica" (1)  Toffo, little bits of toffee. They are kind of like a Rolo without the chocolate only not as sweet. (2) Curly Wurl - mmmm, a twisty flat plait of caramel covered in Cadbury chocolate - yummy (3) Lion Bar - I have no idea. I haven't eaten it yet but the shop girl said it was really good and there are rice krispies in there so you can't go wrong. Each of these were $2.25 each. Shipping from England is pricey.

EPCOT – CANADA

I really wanted to try the ice wine but after the dinner from hell, my hopes of this faded as fast as Illumination fireworks.  The beaver tails are gone so all that is left to me is maple fudge which was again, too sweet.  What is a Beaver Tail?  Ahhhh, it is a paddle shaped plate of fried dough.  It is at least 8" long and about 6" wide and was shaped ... like a beaver tail.  It use to be fried fresh then topped with all kinds of things... powdered sugar, chocolate, strawberries & whipped cream, nutella, spiced apples.  They were lovely.  Then they had them pre-made and the cast members would run them through a little "easy bake oven" set-up.  They were not as good  They were kinda chewy and then they went away.  Look for them in a midwest county faire near you.